Tuesday, July 2, 2013

We Need IVF

We saw our RE today and had a long talk with him. I was right. We need IVF.

We still don't have an exact diagnosis to my infertility, but since we have corrected every other option, the only perpetrators left are my Fallopian tubes. Long story short, it's not a sperm issue, since John is not lacking there. It's not an egg issue, because I've had positives tests, showing that an egg was fertilized. It's not a cervix or lower reproductive organ issue, since we totally bypassed those with IUI. The only thing left are Fallopian tubes. And the only way to get around those is IVF.

I learned something else today. Most pregnancy losses due to factors such as genetics or problems with the embryo usually occur 8 weeks or later. Since mine were so early, and I've had so many (7 weeks, 5 weeks, 4 weeks, possibly a fourth at 4 weeks), they are indicative of tubal pregnancies. Those are embryos that don't make it out of the Fallopian tubes. It's very possible to have multiple ectopics in a row if the Fallopian tubes are compromised. Many tubal pregnancies end on their own very early, so I have been lucky that I haven't needed surgery to remove them. If they don't end on their own, it is a very dangerous and life-threatening situation for the mother if not treated quickly.

We visited with the financial counselor to talk about costs. And with a financial aid program through the office and another program to help with costs of medication, the estimated cost is between $8,000 and $10,000. We just don't have that money, and we won't have it for a long time.

I never thought that after three and a half years that I'd be here. Having put so much effort, sweat, blood, and way too many tears toward this goal, and still sitting here at the beginning. And now, we'll have to just sit here and wait. The hardest part will be sitting here not being able to do anything about it.

Also, today marks the one year anniversary of this blog. What a way to celebrate.


Heather said...

Hi Allie. I'm really sorry. I'm sure I don't know how you feel, but I can only imagine how hard that is to hear.

I don't know how much help you might want right now, or even if you want to talk about it, but I felt like I should share something with you. I have a friend whose sister in law is undergoing IVF, and they also struggled with the money issue. While I'm sure it was hard for them, they made an account on Go Fund Me where family and friends could help donate for IVF. Last I checked, they raised $8500 in the past 2 months. Her name is Erin Roberts, and while I've never met her, I'm sure she wouldn't mind talking to you about it. I could also talk to my friend. Again, I hope this isn't too much info or unwanted info, but I just felt like I should share it with you: http://www.gofundme.com/ababyforjohnanderin?utm_campaign=Emails&utm_source=sendgrid.com&utm_medium=email.

Also, here is a blog that I have loved. I have never met the author, but she has twin boys through IVF and she is very sweet. She might be able to help you know what your options are. http://amycoxvincelli.blogspot.com/

Another thing that might interest you is that IVF is sometimes a lot more expensive in certain states. I know in Utah it costs more than average. There is a fertility clinic here in Jacksonville, FL called Brown Fertility that does it about $5000 less than most places. They have people fly in so they can save that money, and they have really high success rates.

Again, I'm sorry if this is way too much info or stuff you didn't want to talk about, I just felt really strongly that I should share it. I hope you are doing okay. Love, Heather

Rachel Helps said...

That stinks so much! That must be so frustrating that you put all that time/money into IUI and it didn't work. I'm still trying to get around to doing an IUI cycle (everything seems conspired to keep delaying it), and I'm kind of scared about it.

Luckily there's more to us than the fact we can't have babies at the moment, right? :-)

Jules said...

Sorry, Allie :( I'm not sure what else to say or what would be helpful to say, but I'm sorry! I hope that whenever you're able to try IVF it works for you and until whenever that is, I hope things go well for you guys otherwise!

LisserB said...

I'm so sorry Allie. It is such a blow when it comes to realizing that IVF really is the only option left.

When you have had a chance to grieve and process everything, I have a couple of suggestions.

Sending you big hugs!

Amanda Grace said...

Oh honey I'm so sorry to hear that. Please know that you are in my thoughts and prayers. This isn't the end of the baby road for you, it's just another path. I will chat with you soon and when you are feeling up to it. Big hugs